The Salty Tarot Bouncer of Energetic Bullshit™ Onesie
Because your baby deserves to start gatekeeping vibes early.
This cozy onesie isn’t just soft cotton—it’s spiritual armor for the tiniest lightworker. Whether it’s Grandma’s unsolicited parenting advice, that neighbor’s passive-aggressive energy, or a stranger daring to touch your baby’s aura without permission, this onesie lets everyone know: “Not today, negative Nancy.”
👶 Soft & Sassy: Snuggly enough for nap time, savage enough for playtime.
✨ Aura-Approved: Blocks 99.9% of unwanted energetic nonsense (results may vary, but the statement stands).
🧿 Statement Piece: Because nothing says protective bubble of sass like your little one bouncing bad vibes at the door of their soul.
Perfect for baby showers, salty parents, or anyone raising the next generation of no-bullshit energy bouncers.
NB (0-3M)
6M
12M
18M
24M
Width, in
7.50
9.00
10.00
11.00
12.00
Length, in
10.75
11.76
12.75
13.75
14.75
Sleeve length, in
2.52
2.76
2.99
3.23
3.50
Product features - Made from high-quality fabric for printing - Variety of cotton and polyester compositions for different colors - Structural support and shape retention with side seams - Soft and comfortable ribbed knit binding - Convenient snap closure for easy changes
Care instructions - Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F) - Non-chlorine: bleach as needed - Tumble dry: low heat - Do not dry clean - Do not iron
